Seven Pillars of Life - Awakening Alchemy

Over the past couple of months I’ve outlined some of the things that make for a happy, purpose-driven, and heart-led life. These have included such topics as attitude, happiness, fear etc. I thought in today’s blog it might be a good opportunity to pull all the threads together and summarise what I believe can give each and every one of us the happiness and fulfilment we all so richly deserve. Let me preface this by saying; “this is not some fantasy that we can stretch for and never achieve. Happiness, fulfilment and love are your BIRTHRIGHT, as human beings; it is not a bonus for only the lucky few, but yours by right.” Today, I’ll cover the first four pillars and in our next blog, the final three.

So, please let me reiterate: The SEVEN pillars of a happy and purpose-filled life.

  1. Life is SUPPOSED to be wonderful
  2. Attitude is EVERYTHING
  3. LOVE is the ultimate power of the Universe
  4. Aspire to learn to live in the PRESENT
  5. Happiness is a CHOICE
  6. Maintain an attitude of GRATITUDE
  7. Fear LESS

Although I’ve covered these topics before it’s handy , in this age of endless distractions, to revisit something so important.


Life Is SUPPOSED to be Wonderful

Jump For Joy - Awakening AlchemyLife is SUPPOSED to be wonderful: This is absolutely true and for many, something that is equally hard to accept. Many of us were brought up in an environment where there was a scarcity of everything, where Mum and Dad (or whoever was responsible for us) worked relentlessly hard every hour in the day, 24/7, just to put food on the table and a roof over our heads. We grew up with the mind-set that life was hard, that nothing came easy, and that we would always struggle to make ends meet in this cruel, unforgiving world. The problem with that type of thinking is this: “Thoughts are things and they create the reality of the world around us “ If we believe life is hard and an eternal struggle, then that is what life will be. Let us aim to adjust our thinking, to believe in abundance and more specifically in abundance for US, personally. There’s a quote from Rhonda Byrne in her seminal work, “The Magic”, that I think describes this paradox perfectly.

“You were not born to struggle. You were not born to live a life where the moments of joy are few and far between. You were not born to toil in your work five days a week, with fleeting moments of happiness at weekends. You were not born to live with limited energy, feeling exhausted at the end of each day. You were not born to worry or be afraid. You were not born to suffer. WHAT WOULD BE THE POINT OF YOUR LIFE?”  

Rhonda Byrne

 

Attitude is EVERYTHING


Thumbs Up Attitude - Awakening Alchemy Attitude is EVERYTHING: Your attitude determines what you think about, your emotional state, and your beliefs. What you think about, your beliefs, and your emotional state absolutely determines what will come into your life in the way of circumstances and people. Positive thoughts, positive emotions and positive actions will lead to an upgrade of positive outcomes. The reverse, is of course, equally true. This is an immutable law of the Universe – this is Newton’s Third Law of Thermodynamics – for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Sometimes called Karma, it’s really quite simple; what you put out there into the Universe is what you’ll get back, from the Universe. What goes around, comes around.

Maintaining a positive attitude is not as hard as it seems: Meditation, which I discussed in an earlier blog can be a great tool at maintaining a positive attitude. It is a choice! When you wake up in the morning, just say to yourself; “today, I begin my day with positivity in my heart and good thoughts in my head.” Be the person who gets up in the morning and throws open his curtains, proclaiming; “Good morning, God”. Don’t be the person who pulls those same curtains and grumbles; “Good God, it’s morning.”

LOVE is the Ultimate Power of the Universe


LLove is Powerful - Awakening Alchemy OVE is the ultimate power of the Universe: Almost every single leader, teacher, philosopher, and prophet, throughout history, has had the same basic message for us – LOVE one another. (The Golden Rule). There’s a reason for that – they knew the “secret”, they understood that love is the most powerful force in the Universe and that all positive things in life come from love, whilst all negative things, come from a lack of love. What an incredible shame it is, that we, humanity, have chosen to largely ignore this simple precept in favour of other dogma that suits our EGO, our plans, our ambitions, or our need for dominance over others.

It’s time to get back to basics – it’s time to remember what is important and that is love. We can display love in so many simple ways, every single day. Most importantly, though, is to constantly be thinking of love. Remember what we think about, what we feel – our emotions, create our reality. If we focus on love i.e. falling in love with life, then our life will change but more importantly the lives of those around us will change, in response to us. We have the power – it’s all inside of us, just waiting to be released. Be the one!

Aspire to Learn to Live in the PRESENT


Aspire to learn to live in the PRESENT: How much of our time in this very short human life do we spend (a) ruminating over what happened yesterday, what we should have done differently and how unfair what happened was? Many of us live in a constant yesterday, regretting and feeling sorry for ourselves and (b) stressing about and trying to figure out how to cope with what MIGHT happen tomorrow?

At Peace on the Lake - Awakening Alchemy The PRESENT is absolutely all that really matters to us. We cannot change what happened yesterday – yes we can apologise for our mistakes, perhaps try to atone for them but we cannot change what we did, how we reacted, or what we said. Yesterday is gone. Similarly, why waste our precious time worrying about the future, about what might happen, what potential pitfalls lie ahead? We make our own future by the way we think, act and react today! We are the masters of our own destiny, if only we realise it.

Once we stop concentrating on the past or worrying about the future, we can truly enjoy all the beauty and wonder that surrounds us. We live on a beautiful planet, surrounded by friends and loved ones and yet we so often give them scant attention. So, look up, smell the roses, kiss a loved one, greet your neighbour with a cherry “Good Morning” and revel in the sheer joy of being alive amidst such an amazing world.

There we have the first four pillars of our purpose-driven and heart-led life. Remember, I have covered all these topics in many of my previous blogs, along with simple, practical steps you can take to assist you in changing your way of living. Almost all of us want to be happy, purpose-filled and heart-led – I’ve met very few people in my time who don’t want that. By making these pillars the basis of your life, you can go a long way to achieving that goal. Do check out my previous blogs on these subjects, which you can find here: https://bit.ly/2JxICku

If we all adopt these simple life “hacks” what an incredible difference we can make in this world – TOGETHER.


If you liked what you read here, please do check out our previous blogs. The last four can be found here:

Meditation – Why Do it?

Reincarnation – New Thought Movement. 

Reincarnation – Is It For Real? 

Love is a Beautiful Song. 


You may, also, wish to consider joining our website. You will be sent a notification each time a new blog is published, plus occasionally we will send you special offers and fantastic opportunities to win. We will never spam you, though. You can join up here: 


Finally, today, please do pop on over to the section of my website that highlights my Visionary Fiction “whodunit” mystery, Spirit of Prophecy, which incorporates many of the ideas and philosophies discussed in my blog into a fast-paced, fictional, thriller. I know you’ll enjoy it. You can find that here:

Spirit of Prophecy Audio Book - Awakening Alchemy

 


Till Next Time, I’m Sending: Peace and Light

Continuing our earlier discussion in my previous blog, regarding precognition and whether on not it is real or valid:

From a mainstream scientific perspective, the existence of psi phenomena remains controversial- the serious sceptics dismiss all of the supporting scientific evidence and decree that 100% of it can only be due to flukes, flaws or fraud. Yet there are some scientists who are confident that this dismissive sceptical opinion is wrong. Overall there is a body of strong positive evidence for the following: 1) Telepathy 2) Remote viewing 3) Implicit precognition 4) Random number generation and 5) The global consciousness project.

Yet notwithstanding this, applying scientific methods to investigate psi experiences generates uncertainty due to the assumptions about the nature of reality which are formulated within the scientific worldview i.e. the status quo tends to prevail and so it downplays genuine thought innovation. Psi and magical concepts tend to be taboo within the academic and research worlds, and as Upton Sinclair said: “It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends on him not understanding it.” The data in support of precognition and possibly other related phenomena is quite strong statistically and it would be widely accepted if it pertained to something more mundane, yet most scientists reject the possible reality of these abilities without ever even looking at the data! Then at the other extreme there are true believers who base their beliefs on anecdotes and personal experience. The debunkers generally won’t be convinced by any amount of data which is the shame because these abilities don’t actually contradict what we know about science, says Prof Jessica Uttis who was Chairman of Statistic Department at the University of California at Irving, and she was also the president of the American statistical Association in 2016 – the above statements are an extract from the report which she gave to the US Congress.

The concept of time is slippery for many psychologists and therefore they simply don’t believe that precognition can be real, and when leading Cornell University psychologist Darryl Bem arguably proved otherwise and  wrote his findings in a paper called ‘’Feeling the Future,” this was widely called ridiculous and his report was dispatched to the realms of “ crazy land.” Yet Seers throughout history maintain that we are influenced not only by our past but also our future. So, if one completely accepts today’s worldview as inviolate or absolute, then the strength and quality of the evidence or the size of the experiments conducted, simply don’t matter. The phenomena are considered impossible, and that’s that! Meanwhile there’s a really interesting project running for over two decades called the Global Consciousness Project, which is a worldwide version of a random number generator experiment, [RMG] where the outputs of RMG monitors located around the world are compared against long-term baselines during events of major global interest (e.g. terrorist attacks, the death of Princess Diana). This experiment differs because it doesn’t involve individuals studied in the lab but rather is a global experiment which includes everyone, and also tests not the effects of intention but rather the simultaneous focused attention of millions of people. All of the data from this project have been publicly available through its website from 1998, when the project first began. After collecting 500 worldwide events (which took 18 years, because fortunately major worldwide events don’t happen very often) the experiment had achieved an overall result above the Seven Sigma benchmark. That’s associated with odds against chance greater than 1 trillion to one.

 

To explore your psychic or psi abilities, go to www.psiresearch.com. To develop your abilities further go to www.moneymagnet.global/innervoice. Have fun!

If we accept that precognition is real then the traditional understanding of cause, where cause precedes the effect, is turned on its head. Since if we accept it, precognition in the future can in fact influence the present and presumably the future leaps back across time to affect the present in a time reversed flow. So scientifically this requires big paradim shift, which will require powerful evidence – this full shift to acceptance is still awaited.

Premonitions can be experienced calmly, and in my case that’s where certainty of outcome prevails, and this was the case when I predicted the outcome of a fatal car crash when I was a passenger aged 17. I survived as I had the premonition and I wedged myself on the floor behind the driver’s seat. I remember frantically shouting to the others to get down. I was miraculously cut from the wreckage, injured but alive. The others sadly were not so lucky. Sometimes things unravel as predicted and sometimes there is scope to change the future outcome. Moreover, I was delighted to read the recent Daily Mail article about Dr Mossbridge’s, conviction that science will accept precognition since this is one of my big prayers, i.e. that science, spirituality and the supernormal will become more closely aligned. Then as Nicolás Tesla said:” the day science begins to study nonphysical phenomena, it will make more progress in one decade than in all the previous centuries of its existence.”

Are psi abilities distributed amongst the general population just like virtually any other talent? I reckon so, however the key to these abilities being developed is belief and motivation. So what are the benefits of precognition? Ignore pre-emptive flashes at your cost- as I discovered when I disregarded subtle messages saying ‘’Don’t go horse riding today, accident awaits.” After being airlifted into A+E and spending six months in a wheelchair the words hindsight is a wonderful thing really rang true. I wanted to go, so I listened to my head instead of my heart and ignored the voices at my peril! Well ultimately psi shows how interconnected we all are and how important these skills are for the evolution of humanity. Precognition can warn us of situations that are best to be avoided and thus they can keep you and those you love safe from harm, if you heed what you are being shown. Precognition can also nudge you towards situations that are for your greater benefit and lead you in the direction of your dreams and your hearts desires.

Over the years, precognition is a talent which I’ve been able to fine tune and develop. Last month my eldest daughter went on a skiing trip. About a week before she was due to leave, I became very anxious and on waking each morning I was having repeated visions of a really bad fall and not withstanding the new helmet she got for Christmas, a terrible head injury. A few days later I read in a national newspaper that the conditions in France where she was heading were very bad, and tragically there had been a number of deaths with skiers killed on ice as hard as concrete. Understandably, I felt panicked, but I talked to my daughter and asked her to ensure that her skis edges were sharpened so that they would have some bite on the ice. I asked her to be careful and cautious and not take any unnecessary risks- not to attempt to ski down the lower part of the slopes back to the resort where it would be even more icy and potentially dangerous, and generally to keep her wits about her and proceed with care. My daughters both rolled their eyes and sighed: “Here she goes again psychic Sally is ruining the skiing holiday!” Actually, on the last day my daughter was wiped out from behind by an out-of-control skier, she fell backwards, hit her head as I’d foreseen, and she was unconscious for a short while – dizzy and sick afterwards, but she survived without serious injury. She was fine and I believe that sharing the information certainly mitigated potentially very serious consequences. So, precognition is an amazing gift and I’m truly grateful for these abilities.

For my youngest daughters 18th birthday I took her for a reading with a famous psychic in London, and the psychic told me in my reading that I should focus on finishing my novel which would become an international bestseller. Indeed, it did! The novel was published April 2018 and became a bestseller in several categories, and the Audio book recently won first prize in the annual Royal Dragonfly competition.

Just in case you happened to miss the first article on precognition – be sure to check it out here: https://www.moneymagnet.global/money-magnet/precognition-real-you-be-the-judge-part-1/

Unravel more mysteries and learn more about precognition in the novel:

Spirit of Prophecy- the Psychic Detectives#1, by J.J. Hughes, available at Barnes and Noble, and on Amazon – Go here to easily find it: http://bit.ly/2LeRJ84

Spirit of Prophecy - Audio Book

The ability to see into the future has been recognised since ancient times when kings and ordinary people all sought access to the future via Seers, Mediums, Diviners and similar. Premonitions are a foretelling of the future, although sceptics argue they can be attributed to mere coincidence. Precognition is the ability to perceive, to see a future event through extra sensory perception (ESP) or dreams, clairvoyance, before it happens. The term is derived from the Latin pray ‘’Prae’’ meaning-‘’prior to’’ and “cognition” meaning ‘’to gain knowledge.’’ Precognition, thanks to Nostradamus, Edgar Cayce among others, holds a special place amongst psychic [psi] phenomenon which also challenges some of our beliefs about linear time and the sequence of cause and effect, hence scientists remain unconvinced. But the concept instinctively resonates with many of us. Apparently, Abraham Lincoln had a precognitive dream before his assassination. Prophets have featured in many religions from Judaism, Christianity and Islam, and these include Muhammed, Moses to name but a few, and in Roman Catholicism we encounter Fatima.

My personal experience of psi, precognition specifically, have all been related to death, or near -death incidents relating to family, friends and loved ones. In fact, this is one of the key themes in my No1 bestselling novel “Spirit of Prophecy- the Psychic Detectives #1’’ and as Rosetta the main character explains she’s: “been having the same nightmare for two weeks now belting out in her sleep like some cheap Christmas CD stuck on a loop. She knew her premonitions could go either way, and sometimes the outcome wasn’t entirely signed. sealed and delivered, so things could be prevented, altered, maybe even diverted. This was one of those.”

This has been the case with my own experiences, the first I can recall, being at the age of 14 with the death of my grandfather who had been unwell (so coincidence could be argued to some extent) and he had moved in with us so that my mum could look after him. It was an unremarkable Saturday and my younger sister, and I caught the bus into Bradford city centre to go shopping. As the bus passed the town hall, I glanced up at the clock and with a sharp intake of breath I realised that we had only 15 minutes to get back home. I dragged my protesting sister off the bus and running we caught the next one back home. As we walked around the corner into our cul-de-sac the neighbour opposite intercepted us and took us into her house.

Its granddad isn’t it, and we are too late to say goodbye to him, aren’t we? I uttered.

The neighbour looked taken aback, as Granddad sadly had suddenly died five minutes earlier of a heart attack. Consequently, with another of my subsequent premonitions which involved my brother Andrew and the neighbour’s son Graham who were going away on a holiday with a group of friends, this time she totally believed me. All of them, the other mothers relayed what I’d foreseen and warned their sons not to hire a car or drive in Turkey, their holiday destination. The group of young men followed the advice and returned home safe and sound. Praise be.

This premonition started about a month prior to their departure in a wine bar in the city where I worked and when I was out to lunch with a fellow investment banking friend. It was a dimly lit barrels and sawdust sort of spot, and as we were chatting animatedly the candle which had been firmly lodged in an old waxy wine bottle in between us, fluttered brightly, then suddenly in mid- conversation the candle literally levitated out of the bottle and ominously crashed on top of the table- the flame was abruptly snuffed out. My friend and I looked at one another and both of us swore under our breath as this was not a good omen. My friend was keen to point out that it had been me speaking at the time. What it foretold took me over a week to piece together. Meanwhile I wasn’t sleeping, and I was waking up at 1:35 AM night after night, as I tried to figure this out. I became increasingly frantic as I realised that it had something to do with my brother and a car accident. I begged my parents not to let my brother go on holiday to hide his passport; anything to stop this happening. Sensibly they managed the situation responsibly and shared the information with my brother and the rest of his friends. This worked of course, but only the disaster actually unfolding as I foresaw it would validate that the premonition that I’d had was correct – but who needs to be proved right under such ominous circumstances?

So, does precognition perceive the actual future which must occur, or a probable future that might occur? My response to that would be; both – either or.

Another premonition occurred while I was in my second year at university, I woke up one morning with the strongest gut instinct that I needed to go home ASAP. I skipped lectures and caught the train to Leeds where my bemused father picked me up. The following day I went out riding with my friend Kevin who was helping my father exercise my show jumping ponies whilst I was away at university. All seemed fine, until the next day my father banged on my bedroom door and rushed me to the stables where my 14.2hh BSJA pony Redbrooke had gone down with a really bad colic attack. The vet came out several times, but heart- breakingly this ended with a fatal twisted gut. So, it seemed that my horse had called me home to say farewell and for that I was extremely grateful.

“The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible.”                                         Arthur C. Clarke

Be sure to check out Part Two of this fascinating blog on Precognition. In the meantime why not take a look at my wonderful novel, Spirit of Prophecy, which fictionalizes many of the issues I’ve been discussing in these blogs of late. It is available from here: http://bit.ly/2LeRJ84

Spirit of Prophecy - Audio Book

To fully understand fear and the crippling effect it can have on us, we first need to understand that there are two very different types of fear that we as human beings experience.

The first type of fear is that which is known as “physiological fear”. Now physiological fear is built into our genes – it is an evolutionary trait that has helped allow humanity to rise to the top of the evolutionary pyramid. Physiological fear is what alerts us to potentially life-threatening scenarios, that we can choose to ignore (and some people certainly do choose to) at our peril. What defines physiological fear is the need to react physically to it. Literally speaking physiological fear is the difference between life and death. There are some fairly obvious examples here: The fear of heights is one. A long history of people dying when they fell from high places e.g. cliff edges, has ensured that an automatic fear of heights is well ingrained in our DNA. You would not readily walk along a thin girder suspended 100 feet above the ground because your subconscious automatically knows this is not likely to be good for your long-term survival. Similarly, when you are confronted by an angry animal predator, physiological fear requires a physical action to flee and remove you from the danger you face, freeze, or, if all else fails, to stand and fight for your life.

Although some people do make a conscious decision to embrace the physiological fear and overcome it, for example mountain climbers, big wave surfers, skydivers et al, in general terms it is fair to say that physiological fear is good for us and warns us of potentially dangerous situations that we may choose, or not, to avoid. Physiological fear is a good thing – it helps to keep us alive.           

What is not such a great thing however is psychological fear. Psychological fear is not born in our DNA, but is born within our own active imagination, or as Andy Shaw likes to call it – that little monster in our head, called our ego”. Psychological fear is the most crippling and limiting aspect of our psyche. It stops us from reaching our potential in life and most importantly of all it limits the happiness and joy we can experience. In some unfortunate people psychological fear can be so great and so overpowering that it literally drives that person to a complete standstill. 

We’ve all read and heard of people who are so crippled by fear that they cannot even leave their own houses (agoraphobia), others who have a pathological fear of water (aquaphobia) and those too frightened of heights to even climb a set of stairs (acrophobia), but those with phobias this extreme are best assisted in overcoming them with professional psychological counselling and treatment.

 

For most of us the fears that cripple us are just simple psychological fears that we have allowed to become the ruling paradigms in our lives. These are fears that have been drilled into us over the years by the people we have most trusted to guide us in our lives; our parents, our siblings, our teachers, our friends, our work colleagues and indeed society in general. We have, like good and faithful dogs, been exceedingly well trained. The problem is that these fears have become so ingrained in our subconscious that they can stop us from doing things we WANT to do and even beneficial stuff, to grow as individuals and experience the awesome life that we were born to live. So, what are these fears that hold us back from achieving our greatness?                

Perhaps one of the biggest fears that prevents us from achieving our true potential is: THE FEAR OF FAILURE. How often have you thought of a great idea or considered trying a new activity, or a new hobby, even a new career and then been paralyzed by that overwhelming fear of failure? You come up with the idea – you think that’s awesome – yeah! I can do that and then what happens? 

That insane little critter in your head (your ego) starts chattering back to you:

  • “Just who do you think you are?”
  • “What makes you think you can do that?”
  • “You tried something like that before, remember? God, what a disaster that was!”
  • “No, you stick to your knitting – you do what you can do”
  • “Don’t you dare have the temerity to try something new – you know you’re a loser, you’re bound to fail.”
  • “Best you just go and have a beer eh and forget all about it?”

But why are we so afraid of failure? Failure is the first step on the road to success. It doesn’t matter which successful person you interview, you will always find that there is failure written in their story. In fact, many successful people literally “celebrate” their failures. Here, I particularly like the comment of Robert T Kiyosaki (Author of Rich Dad, Poor Dad); “Winners are not afraid of losing. But losers are. Failure is part of the process of success. People who avoid failure, also avoid success.”

If you are to be the greatest you that you can possibly be – you need to overcome this fear of failure. Whatever it is you want to do – you first of all need to make a start, and from then on the key is persistence. Don’t be off-put by the ego that keeps telling you, you will fail! There is an old truism – “if you don’t run the race; you can never be the winner!”

And even if you don’t succeed initially; then you will have at least gained two wonderful things:

1/ You will have the immense satisfaction of having tried something you have always wanted to try. You will have given it your absolute best and you will have grown as a person. None of these things is to be dismissed lightly, they are all part of the building blocks of success; and


2/ You will have so much more experience than you had before. The mistakes you made this particular time will serve you well in your future projects. I guarantee you, you won’t make those same mistakes again. As Heston Blumenthal said; “I learned more from my one failed restaurant than from all the successful one’s put together.” 

So don’t let the fear of failure cripple you and consign you to living a life too ordinary. You were born to excel – you were born to be great. Just take that first step down the path that you long to venture along and embrace any failures as part of the process of growing your greatness.     

What other fears hold us back from achieving our true potential in life?

A big one for many people is the fear of ridicule – of what other people will say about them and what they are doing. In this new, highly connected world it seems that for many people “appearing” good to others is their definition of their success or happiness. Why is this so? Success and happiness start and end with love – the love of one person – YOU FOR YOURSELF! Truly, what does it matter what others think of you?

The biggest problem I encounter is that instead of people loving themselves for who they are – a unique individual with talents and gifts to express – they indulge in fruitless and debilitating episodes of low self-worth and burnt out self-esteem, and then have to seek validation for themselves, from others.

If we truly love ourselves and embrace our own uniqueness with passion, then why should we need validation from anyone else? “To thine own self be true.” If we are going to spend our lives seeking acceptance/approval from others and seeking their plaudits then we will waste so many opportunities to experience the joys of life that make us happy and can fill us with bliss. Fear of what others may think or say is extremely limiting and can paralyze us from action.

YOU deserve better than that! You deserve to fulfil your own dreams and desires, not someone else’s perception of who you should be, or what you should do. Take control of your thoughts and actions, your own destiny and live for you – forget about what others have to say. The time they spend trying to drag other’s down and limit other’s potential is wasting their own opportunities to grow and experience everything that this amazing life has to offer. Don’t fall into the trap of pandering to their small-minded needs. Go out there and be the best you can be; doing the things you want to do. Dream Big and Aim High, feel the fear and do it anyway.  

The final fear I want to cover today is also a biggie for many people – the fear of the unknown; what the future might hold.

First and foremost, you need to understand that the unknown is somewhere out there, in the future. The only thing you can do to control the future is what you do TODAY – here and now.

If you focus your mind on all the potential problems and pitfalls that the future may hold for you – that is exactly what your future WILL hold. You will actually attract to yourself the very things you want to avoid.

You need to accept that you live in the PRESENT, not the past or the future and whatever you think about and do NOW, will be what your future, manifests in your life. Acceptance is key, you can’t change what has happened, but the thing you can manage is your reaction. Deep down we also need to re-program our beliefs, to say to ourselves – okay, this is tough, but what’s the lesson here for me? Then let it go, sometimes things only become clear with the passage of time, but chances are there something way better waiting for you just around the corner. So, have faith, believe in yourself and that the realization of your dreams awaits.

At any given point in time we are exactly where we are meant to be; doing exactly what we are meant to be doing; with the people we are meant to be doing it with. Don’t let the fear of the future cripple your ambitions. Embrace the present – be the person you want to be today, and tomorrow will take care of itself.      

I want to end today with a quote from one of my favourite authors, in fact the woman probably recognized as the one person who introduced the “Law of Attraction” to the masses – Rhonda Byrne. She says in her book The Power; “You were meant to have an amazing life – you were not born to struggle… what then would be the point of your life?”

I couldn’t agree more. We all have within us the potential to achieve greatness, whether it be just within ourselves, within our families, within our community or indeed within the world. We are not limited by anything except our own choices and our own fears.

 

TIME TO NOTCH UP INTO THE FEARLESS GEAR THEN!

 

Spirit of Prophecy - Audio Book

Be sure to pop on over to my fiction section of this website where you can check out my amazing novel; Spirit of Prophecy, which explores, in a fictional narrative, many of the topics I cover in my blogs. If you love “whodunits”, or you’re crazy about horses, or you just like a paranormal twist in your novels, Spirit of Prophecy is just the book for you. http://bit.ly/2LeRJ84

As discussed in my earlier post about Karma, the law of Karma is grounded firmly in Newton’s law of cause and effect: for every action there is a reaction. However, whether you totally realise this or not, when you reincarnated and came here to Earth you enrolled in a sort of spiritual classroom. There are lessons to be learned, exams to be passed before you can advance up the grades, and if you fail, then guess what you get held back a year for a re-sit. Everything that shows up in your life here on Earth is part of that education and learning process, however, unlike certain Buddhist concepts we are not supposed to inescapably suffer. Yes, life is/can be tough, but the suffering is all relative. Karmic debts are intended to be paid gracefully, without bitterness or resentment. Take responsibility. Firstly accept, then forgive and finally atone.

Just to be clear, it is our personal responsibility to clear our karma, in so far as tempting as it may appear, there are no magic mantra’s which enable us to delegate this responsibility. Where some modern religious groups imply that if you ‘say the words: “I accept the Lord Jesus as my saviour and ask for forgiveness.’’ That somehow absolves you, it does not and it’s a sort of spiritual laziness and playing hooky with your homework. We are supposed to seek the truth, our own truth which comes from learning our own lessons and atoning our mistakes.

There are many people and indeed animals with whom we enter into karmic contracts. Some people disagree about animals having souls and re-incarnating, but I have had experience of two of my horses re-incarnating and indeed this is the central premise of my metaphysical crime novel Spirit of Prophecy. I hold back on judgement as to whether or not animals can reincarnate as humans and visa versa as I really can’t comment on that. What I can say though is that all animals feel pain, want love, compassion and dogs, for instance, epitomise a consistency of unconditional love that is difficult for us humans to achieve, even the devout and those of us on a spiritual path seeking awakening and enlightenment.  My daughters are both vegan and have recently converted me [Watch out for my VEGAN WITCH blog posts] but actually the guy who really convinced me was Earthling Ed, check out some of his talks on YOUTUBE or maybe check out his restaurant Unity Diner in North London, UK. Ed is so persuasively reasonable when he points out that all animals feel pain, and whilst dog lovers around the world are mortified by the dog slaughter and consumption in Seoul, that is their choice and custom. Pigs are more intelligent than dogs, they are killed for consumption out of sight and suddenly materialise on the diner’s plate. How is that okay then? I came lately to the logical conclusion that it is not.

With regards to how to balance your karma, energy work, [e.g. Akashic Record level] and clearing [ [e.g. Ancestral] can be awesome but as with the Jesus analogy above, we need to park it and then go along for the ride and fully participate. Negativity and blocks accumulate at a number of different levels:

  1. At the ancestral/family lineage level, [and that’s proven to pass down in our DNA by way of cellular memories.]
  2. At the past lives level.
  3. At the Inner Child level which also benefits from release and forgiveness work.
  4. At the current day EGO level – yes, we have to watch out so that instead of clearing the above, we don’t go accumulating new karma to keep us endlessly on the treadmill, right?

Remember everything is ENERGY, so go benefit from any energy work eg Reki, shamanic healing that you feel resonates with you. [If you’d like my personal recommendations for Akashic Record and Ancestral clearing work, feel free to drop me an email.]

Back to you more actively balancing your karma, which needs to be done in conjunction with positive and beneficial energy practices. When something severely negative happens to you, realise that you inflicted the same kind of pain/trauma on another [most likely the same person] in a previous existence, or you wouldn’t be on the receiving end now. You may protest your totally astonishment and innocence and try to blame/shame the other person. Work through your anger/grief/pain – release it, that’s usual, get it out of your system – whatever it takes but just don’t dwell on it. Instead without bitterness or resentment towards the other person – let it go – step up to a new level of sincere and genuine acceptance that you set this into motion yourself in a previous life. You probably won’t recall the circumstances, but often on reflection we see patterns, recurring themes which just keep repeating themselves. Admit your mistake, don’t try to hide – it will always catch up with you in the end and often with a big rebound effect. Better grasp the nettle rather than sweep things under the carpet to fester, I feel. After all that chip on your shoulder will simply weigh you down. We can’t stop all problems checking in, but we can stop them from over-staying their welcome.

Many of the issues I discuss in these blogs are also covered in a fictional narrative in my exciting, murder/mystery, Spirit of Prophecy. Do be sure to pop over to another part of my website and take a look. If you love horses, I know you’ll adore Spirit of Prophecy. Come take a look: http://bit.ly/2LeRJ84

Carrying on from yesterday’s post about aligning your attitude with your dreams, I’d like to give you some practical steps on how you might achieve this.

There are as many ways of beginning this journey in search of your dreams, as there are “self-help” gurus out there offering to help you on your journey. On that I’ll discuss in more detail but for now I just say: always listen to your intuition, trust your heart- your-gut- your own inner voice: no one knows your truth better than you.

Now I’ll just share with you the simple method I use, which does get results if repeated regularly- it takes 30 days to create a new habit after all. I thank and credit Andy Shaw of “Creating a Bug-Free Mind,” and Janet Attwood [The Passion Test] and Marci Shimoff [your Year of Miracles] for the essence of this system, because they taught it to me:

1/ Get very clear in your own mind what it is you want: [INTENTION]

What are the 3 specific intentions that you want to appear? What time frame are you aiming for, 6 months or a year? Get yourself an inspiring journal and write your intentions down. There is something decidedly effective about expressing your thoughts on paper.

2/ Live your dream inside of your head; make it a reality for you. Or if you’re more of a visual sort then create a VISION BOARD – remember to think big. [ATTENTION]

This really is the fun part of the whole process. It involves using your imagination to really feel, create and experience your dreams come true. Create a mini-video where you’re the star, and the producer too and feel how amazing your life is. Notice who you are with, the sights, sounds, wonderful smells and so on. Each morning when you first awaken or last thing at night before you go to sleep [depending on your preferred bio-realm] RUN your video with a grin on your face and within, and then say your intentions silently, or out loud – as you prefer. For example:

*I am fully loved and supported, and;

*I give and receive love and compassion in abundance.

*I am magnetizing financial freedom and plentitude and have more than enough so I can contribute to assist others.

*I am connecting with and expressing my passions with vibrance, vitality and infinite vision.

The focusing on the present, ‘I am…’ anchors your intention in the NOW, and no matter what happened yesterday or what might happen tomorrow, that’s what counts. Then aim to notice what synchronicities show up during the day – how you are moving forwards, where things are becoming less stuck and how are you moving into alignment with your aims? Jot down your observations in your journal along with the date and your feelings/thoughts at the time.

It’s not just enough to dream it, to experience it inside our minds, we also have to actually do some work and move forward in order to bring our reality into the world. Again, it is important not to look in too much detail at the HOW will I achieve my goal.

Generally, its about avoiding extremes- those who simply nurture positive fantasies of the future sunny uplands, sitting on their butt, without taking action tend to flounder. Whereas those with some defined goals for the future tend to fare well, especially when coupled with a measure of pragmatic realism and resilience.

3/ Relax, breathe and believe that it’s already here: [NO TENSION]

Just focus on one thing that will bring you closer to where you want to be. Rhonda Byrne has a very good quote that describes this perfectly. “You can only EVER take one step at a time, so that’s all you actually need to do – take the next step.”

Above all give it time and be ready to receive. Release resistance and the urge to try control outcomes, just be open and trusting.


The beauty of following this system is; you don’t know exactly how you will succeed, but the Universe does, and it will lead you gently down the right path to success. 

I really hope this simple system of making your dreams into a reality gives you some inspiration to try it in your own lives. Remember; “If you think you can, or you think you can’t, either way you are right!” GIVE IT A GO AND FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS!       

Before I finish today, I’d just like to give you some quick and simple tips on ways to change your attitude from the negative to the positive:

1/ At some point each day, ideally as part of your morning routine/ritual spend 5 minutes listing in your head all things you can be and indeed aim to be grateful for. As with your intentions, jot them down in your journal later on.

2/ Read, listen to and watch less news. In fact, why not do what I did and have a total media ban for a month. You’ll be amazed at how much the negative news has been subtly impacting on your attitude and thoughts.

3/ When you are walking somewhere, smile at people, for absolutely no reason other than you want to share your good mood and attitude.

4/ We live in a world of duality – for every negative circumstance, there is ALWAYS a positive opportunity. Look for the positive in everything and just don’t focus on the negative.

5/ Pay absolutely no mind to anything anyone says about you or does to you. Their opinions cannot hurt you – only your reaction can. Just turn away and be happy and proud of who you really are.

6/ Get into the habit of performing small “random acts of kindness” every single day. They make the recipients day and they also make you feel absolutely awesome. It can be something as simple as standing for a lady or an elderly person on the train or the bus; holding a door open for somebody; or giving a few pesos to an elderly or disabled beggar. It doesn’t matter really because once it becomes an ingrained habit for you, the benefits will surely be seen in your attitude, your thoughts and your actions.

7/ Don’t listen to or spread gossip. Gossip really only hurts one person – YOU! You never know the full story of anyone’s life, so don’t judge them and certainly don’t start or pass on rumors or gossip about them. There is only one person in this world you can control and that is you.

There are many other little tips, but that’s a good start, and I’m sure you can come up with many more. In fact, please feel free to leave a comment on this blog, with your ideas and tips. I’m always excited to get new ideas.  

Do take a look at my debut novel: Spirit of Prophecy. You will find many of the topics that I cover in these blogs intricately woven into a wonderful “whodunit” mystery tale. You can find it here: http://bit.ly/2LeRJ84

Spirit of Prophecy - Audio Book

  Following on from the post about Gratitude:

‘Each one of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.’

                                                Albert Schweitzer

 

Today, we will look at the role that attitude plays in both improving your own life and the lives of those that you surround yourself with; your loved ones, your friends, your work colleagues and everyone else that you interact with on a daily basis.

Your thoughts and actions are like ripples on a pond, spreading out, influencing and affecting everyone around you. Most important though your attitude affects YOU. It affects how you feel, how you think and how you act. If you want to succeed at anything you need to ensure your attitude is spot on. Henry Ford said it best, when he said; “If you think you can, or you think you can’t, then either way you are right!” If you truly want to achieve something, especially something beyond your normal comfort zone, if you think you can do it; you’re well on the way to success, but if you start off the whole process with a list of reasons why you can’t achieve your goal – then guess what? You won’t! ATTITUDE IS PARAMOUNT!

The key to success is belief coupled with resilience. If life throws you off track – which it will on occasions- then you can develop the mind-set that says; Ok, so now I get back up, dust myself off, see what the lesson is for me in this, and then I course correct.’ Most of us desperately want to believe in ourselves, but we allow that incessant little critter inside our head (our ego) to convince us that we are just simply not good enough to do it. You know what I’m talking about – you come up with an idea, something you really want to try, and pretty soon that little voice inside your head gives you 101 reasons why you can’t do it – you’re too old, you’re not smart enough, you don’t have enough resources, you don’t know enough about it…and so on and so on, ad infinitum. What your ego is trying to do is protect you from the pain of failure, retain the status quo, and keep you as it sees it, in the familiar ‘safety zone’ of the known.

The status quo is simple, it’s comfortable, it’s easy, so your ego tries its very best to keep you in check at every opportunity and remind you of your perceived shortcomings in order to ‘protect you.’ What we need to understand is that our ego is NOT us – it is not the real you, it is merely a construct or collection of pre-programmed ideas, concepts and belief patterns that were drilled into us from our very earliest days, and often these have negative connotations and are limiting. You may remember your parents, your teachers or your friends saying things like; “Oh rich people are just lucky, or even worse, all rich people must be crooks; you need to find a stable career, something to support your family; leaders are born, not made – some of us are just meant to be followers; only the really smart people can succeed in life; or perhaps the worst of all, you just have to accept your lot in life, there’s nothing you can do about it” As we grow up if we accept these things as being gospel then we limit our opportunities and life accordingly. Sometimes just singing to the same old tune keeps you stuck and contracted instead of being open to change and resonating with awesome new possibilities.

 You have infinite power inside you to change anything in your life and in your circumstances – life does not have to happen to you; you can make life happen for you, and it all begins with your attitude.

I love this quote from Rhonda Byrne’s book “The Hero”; “It isn’t necessary to have big dreams, but if you don’t have big dreams; big dreams can’t come true.” One of the first things that happens when we begin to get “ground down” by life is that we lose the inspiration and ability to dream. Without dreams we are just mere shells of the amazing, awesome human beings that we were meant to be. Dreams, aspirations, visions and goals and expressing our gifts are what make us unique in this world.

Everyone can benefit from big, wild, seemingly impossible dreams – it’s what gives us a sense of purpose, of fulfillment, and of wonder. If you reach for the stars, even if you don’t always make it, you’ll surely come closer to heaven. We need to remind ourselves that this is OUR life; not our parent’s life, not our bosses’ life, not our children’s life, not even our spouses’ life – but it is OUR life and its up to us to work toward making our dreams come true, for our own sake and for the planet.

The main key to achieving your dreams, is to actually start out on the road to achieving them –THE WHAT OR THE WHERE, not in trying to figure out in great detail how to get there. Whether you believe it is The Law of Attraction, the Power of the Universe, Karma, or just plain good luck doesn’t actually matter; the reality is that when you are following your dreams and approaching life with the right attitude; the people, the circumstances and the opportunities WILL appear in your life and will show you the way.

Be sure to stop back tomorrow and catch Part 2 of this enthralling article on how to upgrade your attitude. I’ll have some amazingly practical steps to impart to you on just how you can make your attitude align with your dreams. You won’t want to miss that.

In the meantime why not take a look at my debut novel: Spirit of Prophecy. You will find many of the topics that I cover in these blogs intricately woven into a wonderful “whodunit” mystery tale. You can find it here: http://bit.ly/2LeRJ84

Spirit of Prophecy - Audio Book

Generally, the idea of karma is associated with reincarnation, the soul derives from a higher dimension but choses to [re-] incarnate on Earth – here on the physical realm of the 3rd dimension. We reincarnate many, many times and on each occasion, we have a soul blueprint which will include lessons to be learned, contracts to be upheld, karma to be balanced or received, gifts to be expressed, and ‘purpose,’ to be discovered and lived. I was open to metaphysical ideas and found them fascinating from quite an early age, in my teens I read Tarot cards and read lots of books about magic and New Age Spirituality. On a personal level I had a profound experience in my early twenties where I become convinced that my Junior show jumper who had been put to sleep owing to a twisted gut, had returned in the guise of my new horse a 16.2 hand palomino called Hooray Henry. Their ways, behavior patterns were uncannily similar, so many synchronicities and ultimately it was an over-riding gut instinct or intuition which had me swayed, as these things can be felt, intuited and believed, but can be difficult to materially prove with hard scientific or otherwise “evidence’’. I’m hoping this will change and that science and spirituality will forge a closer bond going forward.  

“The day science begins to study non-physical phenomena, it will make more progress in one decade than in all the previous centuries of its existence.’’

                                                                    Nikola Tesla

The concept and idea of Karma is one that is rooted in the very history of mankind, right back to the first time we took steps out from the jungle and began to organize ourselves into self-governing communities. Broadly speaking, Karma, certainly as defined by most people today is the concept that; our actions today have an effect on the results we will receive tomorrow. It is the spiritual principle best defined by “cause and effect”. In other words, our intent and our actions (cause) influences the future of what we will receive (effect). If we have good intent, and perform good deeds then that contributes to our “good karma” and we can expect to receive future happiness from it. Conversely, our bad intent or our bad deeds will contribute to us receiving “bad karma” or future negative outcomes.

Karma, is a critical underlying thread that underpins much of the action that takes place in my novel, Spirit of Prophecy and I thought it might be a good time to explore and expand on what karma can mean to us today, in our everyday lives.

Originating in the ancient Indian, Vedic civilization, the philosophy of Karma has been intrinsically woven into the fabric of almost all religions and philosophies over the history of man. Karma is often associated with the idea of being “reborn”. This is particularly apparent in Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, Sikhism, and Taoism. In these religions Karma is seen to affect not only your current lives, but also the nature and quality of your future lives, when you are reborn, after death. 

Over the years, karma has also come to be a concept accepted and understood by the mono-theistic religions, such as Christianity and Judaism. Although not specifically spoken of as Karma, there is an acceptance among many biblical scholars that sin and the effects of that sin i.e. the final judgement are very much in line with the concept and teachings of karma. Similarly, in Judaism, the concept of “measure for measure” applies. In matters of ethics, this means, how one’s actions effect the world, will eventually come back to that person, in ways he or she may not necessarily expect.  

In recent years, the concept of Karma has been thrust very much into the mainstream of philosophical thought, with the emergence of new-age thought and more specifically the 2006 publication of the movie and book, The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne. The principal concept that this new-age spirituality promotes is that, “thoughts are things, and what we think determines very much what our reality will be.” Karma plays a crucial role in new-age thought. The Theosophist I.K. Taimni wrote; “Karma is nothing but the Law of Cause and Effect, operating in the realm of human life and bringing about adjustment between an individual, and other individuals who he/she has effected by his thoughts, emotions and actions.” In simple, laymen’s terms, “what goes around – comes around”. I don’t entirely agree with this definition as the assertion that: “Karma ís nothing but the Law of Cause and Effect,’ is flawed in my experience, it is that to a certain extent, and is certainly based on Newton’s law – for every action there is a reaction, and yet it is so much more. I’ll elaborate more on this in my subsequent post. Meanwhile, remember that karma shows up whether you consciously recognize it as such or not, some children are more likely to recall past lives, but generally even as we evolve and become more spiritually attuned we tend only to remember vague snatches, save perhaps in a good Past Life Regression therapy session – more on that later. Meanwhile look at events in your life as learning possibilities, giving you the opportunity of course correcting. Ultimately you are the master of your own destiny. Accept where you are right now, and what is occurring [everything was agreed up-front, so no point resisting or fighting back – if you do it will just boomerang further down the track, on this circuit or the next and even add some new karma to be worked through as well, perhaps?] and ask yourself, ‘Okay, what’s going on here? What did I do to cause this, now or previously?’ Accept, genuinely without bitterness and resentment that at some level you deserve this. Accept your responsibility and instead of retaliating, forgive the other person and yourself, and send loving compassion instead.

The Secret, The Law of Attraction, Quantum Physics, Manifesting, Gratitude, and other concepts of these new-age philosophers are all areas I plan to expand on in future articles. For now, though, I hope I’ve awakened your interest in this fascinating and constantly evolving area of philosophical discussion and I hope you will take a quick look at my novel, Spirit of Prophecy, where many of these concepts are intricately woven into the storyline, in such a fascinating way. You can find it here, on my website. http://http://bit.ly/2LeRJ84

Here is my opportunity to earn some instant karma by recommending the latest book from my fellow author and dear friend, Ken Fry. Shakyamuni’s Pearl is an exciting, thriller set in modern day Japan, with roots in the ancient system of the Samurai Warriors. This is an absolute “pearler” of a novel and one I can not recommend highly enough. You can find a copy of Shakyamuni’s Pearl, here on Amazon.com: https://amzn.to/2CbmZkM

Or conversely, here on Amazon UK: https://amzn.to/2FnJkio

17th Century, Japan
The Legend…

Ama divers, Makoto and Kaho, discover a gigantic pearl deep in the coastal waters of Japan, resembling the head of Buddha, Shakyamuni. At that time, all finds are the property of their Daimyo, Lord Hatakeyema. Their secret is discovered, and before they can bring the pearl to the surface, they are attacked. Rather than face certain death by beheading, the couple commits suicide by drowning — taking the pearl with them.

Since then, it has never seen the light of day…

The Present…

Maxine D’Argy Steele and Hugo Leyton, renowned researchers, are offered a lucrative deal by an American-Japanese pearl and diamond dealer. Locate the legendary pearl and recover it. They form a team to help them in their quest — a renowned freediver and oceanographer, and an ama diver, Mizuki, who has motives of her own.

But the problem with legendary treasures is that people will kill to own it.

Two rival factions, the Yakuza, a criminal organisation led by Kazuma, and The Flaming Flag Society led by Yamura, are aware of the expedition, and they will use all their resources to possess the pearl.

With danger from above and from below, Maxine and Leyton dodge bullets and threats as they try to resurrect Shakyamuni’s Pearl from its watery tomb.

Many of us are searching for an abundant and purpose-filled life and over the next few months, I hope to introduce you to many of the tenets that can help you to achieve that happiness and a purpose in being. Today, I want to focus on something that is important to our well-being as human beings – maintaining an “attitude of gratitude”.

Why is gratitude so important to us? Motivational speaker, Lisa Nichols tells us; “gratitude is the rich soil in which our future grows.” Just a cliché, you may say. I say, why reject any cliché out of hand? There is a reason why clichés gain ascendancy in our consciousness and that is because at their core, they hold a vital kernel of truth. What I think Lisa is trying to say to us is; the way we think, speak and act, today, directly impacts on where we will be tomorrow. If living in the present is the key to a successful and happy life (and it is) then gratitude is a highly desirable component of that process.     

Most of us, if you’re like me, probably think we are grateful most of the time, but if you sit down and carefully analyse your thoughts and behaviours, you will quickly realize just how easy it is to slip into feeling ungrateful. Most of us spend way more time complaining, whining, doubting and criticizing, than we ever do feeling grateful, satisfied or even accepting of our situation. Thirteenth Century German Philosopher, Meister Eckhart gave us a little gem that sums up the importance of gratitude, perfectly. “If the only prayer you ever utter in your entire life; is ‘Thank you’, then that will suffice.”

I know that some of you will throw your hands up in the air and exclaim; “what have I got to be thankful for? My life sucks!” My answer would be; perhaps that’s because of the negative thoughts, words, and attitudes that you have embraced in the past, but remember you don’t live there anymore. Okay, granted it is not initially easy to override the negative – its human, and proven that over 90% of our thoughts are negative, so expect some serious weeding will be required to plant and nurture the seeds that will blossom into flowers. Leave the old Habit-House. Move onwards and upwards.

Check out the effects of Human Thoughts, Words and Music on Water, on Youtube, bearing in mind that our bodies are comprised of around 70% water. Dr Masaru Emoto, conducted experiments on the cellular structure of water. It was claimed that negative scolding of pure water in petri dishes produced ugly ice crystals after freezing, whereas the praised and blessed water from the same source produced beautiful crystals. His claims have been de-bunked as “water woo,’’ psudo-science and so on. But given that very few universities are open to researching psychic phenomena [yet] and there seems to be a deep and persistent hostility against anything outside the boundaries of current convention, and the assumption that everything in the Universe operates in a mechanical way, I’m very much keeping an open mind on the Water-Woo: let’s face it people can get upset when their deeply held beliefs are put in a state of conflict as this threatens the edifice on which their lives are underpinned.

“The only way to discover the limits of the possible is to go beyond them into the impossible.”

                                                                                Arthur C. Clark

Instead I’m pondering on pilgrimages and people travelling to Lourdes, also the experiments of Dr William A. Tiller, who while at the top of his field chose to explore whether consciousness could affect matter, Gary Schwartz and The Intention Experiments, Dean Radin, Chief Scientist  at Institute of Noetic Science and the  Double Slit Experiment so far his results aren’t widely published as they appear to contradict the dogma-of-our days in so far as the mind over matter tests has been successfully repeated several times. Then there is the Global Coherence Project using random number generators, where the patterns change when major global highly eventful and emotional events occur, such as 9/11, or the death of Princess Diana.

Our beloved dog Faro had to be put to sleep the week before Christmas as he had cancer of the spleen, lungs and an enlarged heart. It was heart wrenching and I miss him every day but I am so grateful to have been able to end his pain and suffering, for him to have a quiet and peaceful transition, that it didn’t happen whilst he was at the boarding kennels over the festive holiday period and that above all,  the three adult children were in town and able to spend precious time with him and say their goodbyes. 

Change the way you think today and that includes being grateful for where you are and what you have – right now. Then think about a bright future filled with love and compassion. No matter how bad your life’s circumstances may seem, there is ALWAYS something you can be grateful for; for the new day, the opportunity to walk, to talk, to breathe, indeed, just the opportunity to exist. We take for granted so many of the wonderful experiences and things that we as human beings are blessed to enjoy and be grateful for, every single day – open your senses, enjoy the world around you and be grateful for the opportunity to do so. When the bad stuff hits, and that’s a part of life after all, feel the feelings, grieve the loss but don’t get stuck there, instead, as soon as you can, look for something to be grateful for. There is always something, even if it is as simple as the sun shining, or the sweet scent of a flower – actively seek out things to be grateful for. You’ll be glad you did.

Some practical steps in adopting an “attitude of gratitude”:

  1. Say “thank you”, every time the opportunity arises and mean it.
  2. Start saying “thank you”, every time you sit down to eat or drink.
  3. Start every day with an attitude of thankfulness – give thanks to the Universe for the new day and for all the blessings in your life.
  4. Make a “gratitude list” – writing things down, has real power, so jot down the things you feel grateful for.
  5. Stop complaining – don’t vocalise your annoyance or frustration.
  6. Don’t gossip – gossiping only hurts one person – the gossiper.  
  7. Ingrain the attitude of gratitude into your subconscious. How do you do this? Make it a habit. And, how do we create habits – by repetition. Regularly and meaningfully practice the art of gratitude and in a short time it will become as normal to you, as walking, getting dressed in the morning, or driving. You won’t even have to think about it, anymore, it will just come naturally.    

The Six Pillars of Life:

  1. Life is SUPPOSED to be wonderful!
  2. Attitude is EVERYTHING!
  3. LOVE is the ultimate power in the Universe!
  4. Live in the PRESENT!
  5. Happiness is a CHOICE!
  6. Maintain an attitude of GRATITUDE!

I will be expanding on all of these other five pillars, in articles in the future, but in the meantime, please feel free to take a peek at my exciting new book, Spirit of Prophecy, which has many of these ideas running through it, as well as being a fun and exciting “whodunit” along with a touch of spiritualism, a pinch of witchcraft, a tad of new-age thought, some lovely horses and there’s even an alien or two making a timely appearance. It’s an absolute corker and you can find it here: http://bit.ly/2LeRJ84

Money and Your Wallet - A love Story

Money affects so many aspects of our lives that conflict becomes inevitable if couples don’t know how to manage their finances together. So it’s hardly surprising that a recent couples counselling [Relate] survey identified money worries as THE issue placing the biggest strain on relationships in the UK. In the US, a 2016 Money Habits and Confessions survey by Learnvest found that 1:5  Americans had never had a serious conversation  about finances with their significant other. Globally, that’s quite a few ostriches gulping down sand, eh? So this article aims to get more of us unburied whilst avoiding the undead in Financial-La-La -land.

” Money may not buy love, but battling over it will bankrupt your relationship.’’ – Michelle Singletary

Couple conflict and taking cash hostage

I discovered first hand that tensions can erupt if one of you is a spender who  lives for the here and now, and one is a squirrel saver stashing it away for  retirement and a rainy day.  On the spectrum between the compulsive spender and the fanatical hoarder where do you fall? Our money mind set is often conditioned by the attitudes of close family members. What were your parents’ attitudes and who do you  most take after?  Right now, I’m somewhere in the middle of the two polar opposites, but several years ago after I was diagnosed with melanoma and as the prospect of death came sharply into focus, I became more ‘in the moment’ and ‘I want it now.’

Kiss goodbye to instant gratification

Perhaps that’s understandable given the serious health circumstances and the wider societal context where instant gratification is increasingly becoming the norm? However, the divergent outlooks in the relationship caused lots of arguments. Now, as I survey the post-divorce landscape this is undoubtedly cause for considerable regret. Divorce can haemorrhage finances much faster than any sticking plaster can fix.

Why rip dollar bills or banknotes in half?

Also as I analyse and accept my part in the escalating disputes, I recognise that as an independent career woman with her own bank account I resented the undue and heavy handed [from my perspective] control my husband tried to exert over the joint finances. In response I stopped listening, dug in and focused only on the unreasonableness of his position and inevitably the [assumed] superiority of mine. For more about the antidote to financial deafness check out the Listening skills page on my website. As Robert Kiyosaki pointed out:

‘’It’s not how much money you make, it’s about how much money you keep, how hard it works for you, and how many generations you keep it for.’’

So, looking back what would I have done differently?

Wallet-wad *1 – *Disarm *Defuse *Discuss

First and foremost: protect and preserve

Winning the argument and being right is not the real objective as I came to appreciate rather a little too late. The real objective as Robert Kiyosaki  author of: ‘’Rich Dad, Poor Dad’’ hints at above and I’m elaborating on here is, to protect and preserve what you have managed to accumulate for your own benefit and above all your family’s. In that context talking openly about money with your significant other, heading off the arguments becomes less of a nice to have option and more of a fundamental necessity. Also respecting the other person’s perspective, establishing trust, and demonstrating a willingness to compromise are all key to successful outcomes and positive resolution. What I learned is that resistance and a refusal to talk constructively about money can be devastatingly costly in both emotional and financial ways – hence I’m advocating the path of least resistance and regularly touching base to keep communication lines open. A heavily litigated divorce decimates the family pot quicker and more effectively than a vampire bat locked on to its prey, and as I can also confirm from first-hand experience the role of a single parent is tough and can be very stressful, with or without garlic to ward off unwanted predators.

SCARY STATS – hot off the Transylvanian press:

Disrupted relationships- separations or divorce –cause household  incomes to diminish from as much as 28-42% and particularly pose a threat to mothers, as evidenced by an attendant increase in benefit claims. Significantly the threat is worse for mothers in low income families, with almost half of American families experiencing poverty. The family economy changes for the worse, significantly decreasing the household net worth, and many women experience a substantial decline in their financial circumstances after divorce or separation, which in turn can adversely affect their children and future generations. Nb. the same is not necessarily true of men/fathers who can actually see their incomes not only recover quite quickly but also increase post- divorce. As such separation/ divorce are unlikely to feature in any ‘How to Remain Rich or Affluent Top Tips’ list – quite the opposite, as its contraindicated in the broad aim and aspiration of keeping assets intact and overall wealth preservation.

“Writers write, readers read, money talks” – Toba Beta

Wallet-Wad *2 – Avoid Separation/Divorce like a hole in the head

Enrich your engagement levels

When a couple are on the same page about money, they can work together through difficult times and have a map to focus on jointly.  Are you in a new relationship that’s getting more serious? Make sure you bring up money issues before taking any big steps such as living together or getting engaged. Make money discussions a regular thing but not when the bills hit the mat or the in- box, or at other times of financial stress. Resistance to constructively discussing money is counter- productive and also may contribute to the ongoing gender pay gap, which arguably needs to be closed. To that end, all credit to British PM Theresa May who is calling for all firms to publish their gender pay gap as she fears it is not being closed quickly enough.

“There are many languages in the world but the most widely spoken and understood by everyone are power, love and money.” – Bangambiki Habyarimana

How to have productive money natter and cash friendly chatter

  1. Money TalksStart Small – start by discussing more wallet conducive nights out with friends. Break the ice and ask how you can all hang out and have fun for less. Open up conversations about perks and benefits that their employers provide and ask what percentage of their salary they save or are they planning to save into their retirement fund?
  2. Scale Back-don’t succumb to shopping splurges : the feel good factor will be short lived and the debt hang over hard to shift. Take out cash, set a limit and leave your cards at home. Remember the love of stuff is limited as it can’t love you back, and in order to apply the brakes or rein back the bolting horse when it’s got the bit between it’s teeth, ask yourself this – How will this make me feel in 10 minutes time? How will this make me feel in 10 months time? In ten years from now? Learn to make a distinction between what you need vs what you want- aim to defer gratification. If you want to spend less and save for your future plans be open with your friends, come clean and explain your situation and don’t get sucked into debt trying to match their lifestyles.

    ‘I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.’ – George Best

  3. Negotiate – when out shopping for large essentials ask for a discount for cash. If you’re dining out with friends ask to split the bill according to who ate what, that way you can manage your expenditure whereas dividing the bill equally may end up with you subsidising the others. Do you have a friend who’s a bit of a tight-wad? If so ask: Did I get the last one, or did you? This politely alerts the wallet-warrior that’s there’s an etiquette when it comes to paying. Hopefully they’ll get the hint! Generally, also try suggesting more reasonable venues – a gastro pub vs the gourmet restaurant, fixed special price menus and go mad on money-off-vouchers. Get a savings habit, and get ahead.
  4. Schedule-probably the two most difficult money conversations that render many of us tongue tied are:

Tricky discussions with the significant other

Don’t avoid the subject, plan ahead and say: ‘How about on X day, we sit down and spend some time talking about money?’ Then when the time comes be upfront about your concerns but avoid being judgemental –discuss and agree where cut backs can be made. Draft a budget and a roadmap to pay down variable rate debt – highest rate first. Review progress regularly and with debt cleared or consciously being managed, aim to start saving/investing on a regular basis.

Asking the boss for a raise

‘Your salary or income scale doesn’t define you, but it more than likely will determine your comfort level in retirement. Always have feathers in your nest egg.’ – Jill Hughes

Kicking taboos into touch

Talking about salary can be considered as one of the last taboos, albeit millennials are 4 times more likely to discuss compensation with colleagues than baby boomers. So let’s all clear the air. The time to pipe up to get a fatter pay-check/cheque has arrived. This is covered in more detail in my free report: ‘3 proven ways to pull more money to you in 30 days,’ available on my website. First of all do your Research and find out the going market rate for your position and how that compares with the internal salary scales, also check out what perks and benefits competitors offer so that your ‘ask’ is in the bandwidth and you don’t undersell yourself. Record – keep a dairy of all the extra things you’ve taken on and pulled off, mention praise and positive feedback you’ve received. Blow your own trumpet regularly. Ask your boss, ‘when would be a good time to discuss a salary review?’ and get a date in the dairy to do so. Rehearse – practice your pitch with a friend or your partner. For more on this and how to increase your going rate if you’re self-employed in a service business, sign up below. Remember overnight success is a myth but small incremental changes will soon stack up. The sooner you get started the better – good luck!

The Mission

To help people get clued up, fired up, opened up about money and finances.

Appendix:

i)  Marripedia ‘The effects of divorce on Financial Stability.’